Barack the Machine-Slayer

by David Faris

John the Defeated War Hero and Sarah the Humiliated Geographer can now head back to their redoubts to lick their wounds and accept their trouncing by Barack the Machine-Slayer. With both North Carolina and the seat of the Confederacy in Democratic hands, it is the GOP that is, in Zell Miller's immortal words, a national party no more.

It was deeply satisfying for Pennsylvania to be called by 8:15 — most watchers had barely sipped their first blue martini — and for Obama to win Pennsylvania by the same 11-point margin by which McCain won Texas. It was reportedly the turnout numbers in Philadelphia that caused the networks to swiftly end McCain's delusions of turning the Keystone State red.

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As expected, it took barely 24 hours for Gov. Palin to be thrown directly under the wheels of the Straight Talk Express. Fox News apparently throughout the campaign sat on word that Palin didn't know Africa was a continent and couldn't name the countries in the North American Free Trade Agreement.

Thankfully no one asked her about the participants in the Spanish-American War or the timing of the War of 1812. America the Relieved can only thank Obama's 66 million voters (and counting) that such a person was not granted the vice presidency.

The man they call No Drama Obama just dusted two of the most formidable machines in modern political history — first the combined weight of the Clinton juggernaut and the Democratic Party apparatus, and then the full onslaught of the Republican attack machine and what James Wolcott calls its media attack poodles. And in doing so he crushed the mighty McCain maverick brand and left it twitching and gasping for air.

For those looking to read the exit poll tea leaves to divine the electorate's mood, it really was quite simple: The Republicans looted the treasury to pay for things the people do not much care for — wars, kickbacks, pork and useless abstinence-only education programs, just to name a few. The Democrats ran a savvy and charismatic adult who promised to spend money on better things and to restore government's oversight role to the financial sector.

While several Senate races hang in the balance, Obama emerged from his walloping of the Republicans with enlarged congressional majorities and a mandate to pursue the main planks of his campaign — implementing universal health care, pursuing alternative energy, fighting climate change, and bringing a swift and dignified end to the war in Iraq. If he cannot deliver these things he will rightly be judged a failure.

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The greater danger to an Obama presidency is the same threat that derailed LBJ — an unpopular war begun by his predecessor, made all the more dangerous by the imperial presidential powers he will inherit from George the Constitution-Shredder. The president-elect must not make the mistake of dragging out our withdrawal from Iraq, or of sending thousands more Americans to fight and die in Afghanistan.

No matter how large the victory looks today, the Republicans will be back. Like the Cylon robots in the new Battlestar Galactica, Republicans may disappear for a number of years, but when they reappear they will be more dangerous than ever, carrying with them new wedge issues backed up with focus-tested fearmongering. We underestimate their staying power and appeal at our own peril.

As for me, I keep rolling my mouse over that CNN electoral map, taking in the 6-point victory in Virginia, the 24-point California shellacking, the 26,000-vote victory in Indiana, of all places, and the 8-million-vote popular-vote margin. The next time someone calls me a coastal elitist or tells me I live in a liberal enclave, I'm going to point them to that map, and I'm going to smile.

David Faris is a regular Slant contributor. To respond to his Slant or submit one of your own, e-mail your 650-word opinion piece to bhoward@citypaper.net.